What A Bitch

2015 that is. 

Going into 2015 I thought I’d accomplish a lot personally and professionally. Basically, it laughed in my face and said, “I’ll go ahead and screw you over every chance I get.”

I found myself crying way more than I ever have. Growing up I was trained, literally from age 9, that crying was unacceptable. I’ve never been so emotional in my life as I was in 2015. But I learned that it’s okay to cry.

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I realized some friends aren’t meant to be there, I lost a cat, I lost an old friend, which was one of the worst things I’ve ever experienced. My parents are in the process of moving across the country, and I’m still trying to figure out what to do with my life. It’s been a tough year emotionally and mentally, but I’ve come out alive and a hell of a lot smarter.


Looking back it’s often easier to remember the negatives, then something shifts and you start remembering the positives.

I traveled.

Tennessee, Michigan, Florida, New York, Denver, Tennessee again.

I caught up with old friends and made some new ones.

I learned who really matters in my life and cut out the people who don’t. I found forgiveness for things I never thought I would forgive.

New, inspiring stuff.

I got a new job that I had been longing for. I bought a new car, which was bitter sweet. I’m in a new apartment with a new roommate. I rescued a new cat, and was able to finally get a new, fancy phone. I can’t say I am not in a good place.

I have more responsibilities than ever.

It’s terrifying to realize I might actually be a full-blown adult. Only took 25 years but I can support myself and that’s a great feeling.

Going into 2016 I have a clean slate.

I want to find a new city to live in by December. I want to meet new people in the hopes of growing my professional network as well as my personal one. I like my job, but I want to find one that I love and can do for the long haul. I want to get a dog. I want to open my eyes to new cultures and experiences outside of the south. I want to cut out the bad habits to make room for the good ones.

Acceptance is key.

I want to understand that I can’t change peoples’ minds and I can’t control others’ actions. I can only control my actions and reactions. That is something I have struggled with this year.

If the universe deals me shitty cards, I want to handle it gracefully and with a sense of humor.

I want to be selfish in a way that benefits the people around me.

If I focus on my goals and my happiness I’ll be a more delightful person to be around.

If you have had a tough go at it…

I urge you to think about all that has gone right. Be thankful that your life is all yours, and if you’re unhappy it’s on you to change it. I will have a better, more successful year. 2016 will be my bitch.

~S

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